Valentine's Day? What's That?
by enchantment1972
Summary: Valentine's Day doesn't exist on Pete's World but the Doctor is determined to celebrate it with Rose. When a parallel Reinette arrives at Torchwood, he worries that their first Valentine's Day together will be their last. **Tenth of the Forever After series**
1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**Parallel Reinette will not meet the Doctor until Chapter Three. The idea for this story wasn't so much how the men screw up trying to impress the women they love, which was very fun to write, but to resolve the aftermath of the GiTF episode. I am very close to writing the Doctor and Rose's wedding and I don't see how they could truly live their life together without any regret unless they discussed and came to a final resolution about Reinette.

**Disclaimer:** I do not own anything in relation to Dr. Who, Disney's Beauty and the Beast or The Kama Sutra.

**Chapter 1 Relationships**

The elevator doors slide open to reveal the floor that contains the offices for Alien Archives and the Torchwood operatives. The Doctor, Rose and Jack all step out of the elevator after returning from a very late lunch.

"I'll see you soon, love," bids the Doctor as Rose leaves in search of Jake.

The Doctor is watching Rose walk away when Jack inquires, "So are you still planning on knocking Rose off of her feet with this Valentine's Day that you were talking about?"

"Absolutely!" the Doctor grins. "Valentine's Day is an excellent holiday in my universe, I can't believe that you lot don't celebrate it here."

His gaze is distant as he reminisces, "It's filled with love, flowers, chocolates, promises that you don't intend to keep…" He shakes himself from his reverie when he realizes, "No, wait, that's Beauty and the Beast."

Jack chuckles, "Well, it sounds great. That's why I went and bought Donna a book as a token of my affection."

"Oh, really?" asks the Doctor. "What book?"

"The Kama Sutra," replies Jack. "I figure it's Latin for calm and soothe, right? I'm hoping that it will help her to relax after a hard day at work. Pretty thoughtful, huh, Doc?"

The Doctor grips Jack's arm and presses, "You didn't give it to her yet, did you?"

Jack bears a smug expression as he boasts, "I had it sent special delivery. She should be receiving it any time now."

The Doctor doesn't need to tap into his Timelord abilities to know that a storm is coming. He whispers in terror, "Jack…"

He's interrupted by Donna's screech of Jack's name ringing throughout the office. Completely unfazed, Jack asks, "Yes, Doc?"

The Doctor squeezes his shoulder gently in support and croaks, "Good luck." Jack offers a quick salute and an unwitting smile before marching off to meet his fate.

Meanwhile, on the other side of the office, David McDonald is busy trying to open Jake's drawer for him. "Thanks for helping me out with this before we head out to lunch, David," states Jake.

"No problem, lad. I'm glad to be of help." He glances up at Rose's approach and beams in delight. "Rose Tyler, what a lovely surprise!"

Rose grins wide in greeting and remarks, "I'm more surprised to see you here, David. What are you doing here?"

"He's helping me out of a jam," supplies Jake. "Literally." Rose's quizzical glance urges him to elaborate. "Your boyfriend decided to hide a stash of alien marmalade that he confiscated during our last recovery mission inside my drawer. When he tried to sonic the lid open, the jar started smoking so he dropped it back in the drawer and slammed it shut. I haven't been able to open it since."

Rose gives him a sympathetic look as the Doctor stalks over and demands, "What's McDonald doing with my marmalade?"

"No worries, Mr. Smith," declares David with a slight smirk. "It's not Rose's drawers that I'm trying to get into at the moment."

Rose laughs at David's cheekiness while both she and Jake hold a furious Doctor back. "Now I may not have access to a screwdriver as fine as yours but I haven't had any complaint with my tool."

He picks up his plain, ordinary, human screwdriver and works swiftly to finish the job. "Now my lovely audience," as he tosses a saucy wink to Rose, "watch as I pull out my tool, insert it, wiggle it around a bit, give one final sharp thrust…and we're off."

The Doctor merely glares at David while he shakes off Rose and Jake's grasp. "Rose," instructs Jake, "you need to go to Pete's office. He said that once you checked in with me that you were to go to his office and meet a special messenger."

Rose views the mischievous twinkle in Jake's eyes with suspicion but consents regardless. "Okay." She turns to the Doctor and mouths 'behave' to him before departing for Pete's office.

The Doctor's smile is tight as he looks at David, who returns it with a smug one of his own. Jake continues to watch the two men as he muses to himself, _Who needs television?_

************Currently, in another area of Torchwood…************

Jack strolls into Donna's office and greets, "Good morning, Donna. I heard your melodic tones calling for me. What can I do for you?"

Donna slams the Kama Sutra down onto the desk where it lays open to a section with several illustrations. With clenched teeth, she grits, "Would you care to explain this?"

He walks over to her desk and flips the page back and forth while studying the pictures. "I'm not sure. Is it pilates or yoga?" Donna gapes at him as he continues his introspection. "Why is this guy's arm so short?"

Donna spins the book to a certain angle causing Jack's jaw to drop and his eyes to widen in realization. He gasps, "That's…that's…that's so naughty!"

He stares at her in disbelief. "And you want me to explain this to you?"

"Yes," growls Donna.

"I don't think that's in my job description!" he asserts. "Why are you showing me this?"

Donna spits, "Ipswich! You bought it for me!"

"I did not!" protests Jack. "I would never, ever…," he trails off as she closes the book and shows him the cover. "Oh, I guess I did." He gazes at her with a worried expression. "I didn't know it was like that, Donna. _I swear._ I thought it was a book on relaxation techniques."

Donna shakes her head in exasperation and sighs, "I'm sure you did, Jack. However, for future reference, this is the most infamous sex book of all time. Although to be fair, these _techniques_ generally do result in extreme relaxation."

One glance at Jack reveals how distraught he is so Donna murmurs consolingly as she hands him the book, "Here, Sunshine. You need this more than I do."

He reluctantly accepts it and is saved from any further embarrassment by a soft knock on the open door. "Excuse me, Donna," pardons the woman with a French accent, "but the lab has finished their testing so I'm ready to meet with Dr. Smith now."

Donna gestures for her to enter and informs Jack, "This is Jeanne Poisson, the Director of Human and Alien Relations for Torchwood France."

"Yes," states Jack coldly as Jeanne gives him a heated appraisal, "we've met before." He turns to Donna with a stony expression while keeping the book hidden from Jeanne's view. "Is there anything else, Miss Noble?"

Taken aback by Jack's attitude, Donna can barely focus enough to hand Jack a package. "Yes, I need you to give this to the Doctor. He asked Gramps to find something for him, and then please ask him to come to my office."

"Right away, Miss Noble," he assures her in a curt tone. He spares Jeanne a brief glance as he walks past her.

"Goodbye, Mr. Harkness," she croons. "It has been such a pleasure seeing you again."

Jack shudders in unease as he speeds down the corridor. When he's far enough away, he leans against the wall and takes a deep breath. He's surprised to see that he's forgotten about the book that he's been clutching and out of curiosity, places the Doctor's box on the floor so that he can look through the book.

He turns to the page he was hunting for and wonders, _Infamous sex book, hmmm? Well that can't be the sixty-nine that I've heard everyone talk about. That page doesn't seem any different than the other pages. Oh, well._

He retrieves the box from the floor and quickens his pace to seek out the Doctor who he finds talking to Jake while David is finishing a call on his cell.

"Mr. Smith," interrupts David, "I have some bad news for you regarding the exotic fish that were delivered to the hotel and placed in the fountain."

"Oh, no!" frets the Doctor. "The koi are a gift for Rose. Are they dead?"

David answers with a trace of laughter lacing his voice. "No, _they're_ not dead and they're not koi. One of the men on my crew used to live in the Amazon and he recognizes them as piranha. They must have delivered them by mistake."

The Doctor manages to pale and turn green all at once at David's next words. "He also said that you'll want to tell your next door neighbor what happened to her cat. Apparently, Frisky's remains now strictly consist of a red collar with a metal heart that has her name engraved on it."

"Tough luck, Doc," interrupts Jack as he hands him the package from Donna. "Maybe this will cheer you up, it's from Mr. Mott."

"Ooohh, I've been waiting for this!" exclaims the Doctor. "Forget teddy bears, they're so boring and predictable. I bought Rose a stuffed owl in honor of Shiver and Shake!" He's lifting the lid off of the box as he tells them, "Wilf Mott told me that he had an old friend who specialized in them, makes them almost life-like."

He peers down into the box and his excitement quickly fades into despair. Jack instantly senses his change of mood and questions, "What's wrong, Doc?"

The Doctor gazes down into the box forlornly while he answers flatly, "It's a stuffed owl."

Jake inquires, "So, that's what you wanted, right?"

The Doctor looks up with a grim expression and states, "No, what I wanted was a stuffed toy owl. This is an actual stuffed one from a taxidermist."

Everyone leans over to peek inside the box. David is the first to comment, "That's disgusting."

Jake agrees, "Yeah, it is. Nice work though."

"Great," bemoans the Doctor. "No fish and no owl. All I have left are the pastries."

"What pastries, Doc?" asks Jack.

Before the Doctor can reply, he glances off to the side and notices Liane Piper of Piper's Pastries walking around the corner in a daze. He watches her in concern and murmurs, "Liane?"

All four men turn in her direction and once David spies Liane, he is immediately captivated by her. His hearts speed up, his breathing quickens and he becomes so lost in just the thought of her that he doesn't notice his shimmer distorting to reveal his true appearance.

Thankfully, Jake does notice and hurriedly calls David's attention to his problem as he leads him away from the others and around a corner.

Jake snaps his fingers in David's face and hisses, "David, focus! Not everyone here knows your secret!"

Away from Liane's presence, David is able to shake free of euphoric state. He grabs his friends arms and blurts, "Jake! Did you see her? She's beautiful!"

Jake stares at him in consternation as he demands, "What? Who are you talking about?"

"_**Her**_**," **growls David passionately._**"My mate."**_

Jake's confusion worsens as he tries to follow David's train of thought. He slowly repeats, "Your mate? Okay. And when did this happen?"

"Just now!" cries David excitedly. He pulls Jake to the edge of the corner and whispers "Look. Who is that?"

Jake scans the room, focusing only on the female co-workers, and queries, "Who is who?"

He stares at his best friend as if he was out of his mind. "Isn't it obvious? She's right over there!" David points to a woman who is identical to Rose Tyler with the exception of her light brown hair, glasses and emerald green eyes.

One side of Jake's mouth quirks upwards in amusement as he watches her balance on one high heel as she tries to tug the other one back into place. He chuckles inwardly as he recalls that she always did have trouble whenever she wore heels.

He turns gleefully to his oldest friend and practically sing-songs, "David McDonald, are you besotted with our lovely Liane?"

David crows, "You know her! How do you know her?"

Jake replies, "We've been friends ever since she moved out here from Ireland. Plus, she caters all of the Vitex parties. If you want the best, then you want Liane."

David vows with a growl, "_**Oh, I want her**_," and his shimmer starts to break up again.

Jake huffs in exasperation. "Mate, pull it together! What is wrong with you?"

David backs away from the corner and leans against the wall. "It's the Rapture. My people have an innate instinct that causes a **very** strong reaction inside of us when we finally meet our mate."

Jake swiftly processes the information and surmises, "Is that what's affecting your shimmer?"

David takes a moment to think it over before concluding, "It must be. Usually my people's mates have been found on our own home world, but there have been instances of finding them off-world. Although in those instances, I don't recall an Owthtiwrettebian ever having to disguise their appearance."

Jake responds, "Well pull it together, buddy. Torchwood does it's best to encounter alien races on friendly terms but not everyone here automatically trusts an extraterrestrial."

David nods somberly and Jake advises, "Now we'll start off slow with an introduction and then we'll see where to go from there."

David smiles gratefully and says, "Thanks, Jake. I don't know what I'd do without you. You know, back when we were kids and I first arrived on Earth; I was terrified of everything until I met you. Meeting you was the best thing that ever happened to me."

Jake grins back in response. "For me too, mate."

David allows a moment of sadness and guilt to cross his features. "I'm sorry that I couldn't be there for Canary Wharf, Jake. I know how much Ricky meant to you."

Jake stares down at the ground and mutters in a gruff voice, "Yeah, it was hard." He looks up and reminds him, "But Owthtiwretteb had its own troubles and you were needed back home." His slight smile grows into a larger one as he reasons, "Besides, you came back just like you promised. That means a lot to me."

David remembers how hard it was for Jake to deal with never having been given the chance to say goodbye to his friend, Mickey, when he decided to remain in the parallel universe. Even without that incident, he always knew that he would return to Earth. Jake was too good a friend to ever be left behind.

"Hey, what are best friends for?" quips David as he draws Jake into a quick comforting hug. "Now try not to treat me like eye candy so she doesn't think that I'm your latest boyfriend."

Jake laughs, "Oh, please! I could do _so much better_ than you."

David scoffs, "You wish," as they make their way back over to Jack and the Doctor while continuing to argue good naturedly.

**Next Chapter: Rapture**


	2. Chapter 2

**Author's Note:** Patisseries is French for pastries.

**Disclaimer:** I do not own anything in relation to Dr. Who.

**Chapter 2 Rapture**

After Jake insists upon a quick once over to ensure a good first impression, he and David continue making their way back over to the Doctor and Jack. Neither man has noticed their absence as they both have been absorbed in watching Liane wandering aimlessly.

Liane slowly becomes aware of her surroundings as she spots the Doctor. She walks over to him and silently hands him the box. More concerned with Liane's state of mind at present, the Doctor ignores it and gently inquires, "Liane, are you okay? What happened to you?"

With a soft whimper, Liane removes bits of croissant from her hair. "What happened is that I came by to deliver my extra special, special deluxe box of pastries that you asked me to whip up for Rose."

"Oh, yes!" exclaims the Doctor. "And did you give them to her?"

Liane's lips clamp together in a firm line of frustration and she straightens her glasses before she huffs, "Yes, I did. In fact, I gave her my very best box of French pastries."

"French pastries?" squeaks the Doctor. _Oh no._

"Yes," states Liane as she tries to shake more crumbs from her hair. It contains my best mix of croissants, pains au chocolat, éclairs, profiteroles, beignets and the crème de la resistance…"

_Don't say it. __**Please**__ don't say it_, the Doctor silently pleads, his entire body wracked with anxiety.

"French tartes!" finishes Liane. The Doctor shuts his eyes tight with a pained expression. He opens his eyes when Liane starts jabbing at the box with her finger. "Just look at what she did to my box!"

The Doctor glances down at the beaten box to see a crumpled banner across it stating, 'Entice Your Lover With A French Tarte'.

She gazes at the Doctor and recalls, "That's the exact same expression that she had on her face right before she went crazy! She pulled the box open and grabbed a handful of pastries like she was trying to strangle them into submission!"

Liane attempts to tidy her appearance as she adjusts her skirt and blazer and brushes off more crumbs. "Then she shook them in my face while demanding to know who would be so utterly heartless and inconsiderate as to send her such a rubbish gift!"

The Doctor takes on a look of terror until Liane admits, "I was so shocked that I was rendered completely speechless!" He sighs in relief until she confesses, "And then I was finally able to blurt out your name!"

When he simply stares blankly at her in response, she quizzes, "Do you have any idea what would cause her to act like that? She's always been so sweet and kind whenever she visited my shop."

The Doctor shifts uncomfortably as he rambles out an explanation. "Well, there was once, very long time ago mind you, a slight, minor, practically insignificant incident, more of an incredibly brief acquaintance really…with a French courtesan…"

Liane gapes at him incredulously and cries, "What? Are you serious?" She takes a threatening step closer. "And you didn't deem that little fact important enough to tell me?"

The Doctor becomes defensive and counters, "How was I supposed to know that your French pastries were your crème de la crème of baked goods?"

"Gee, I don't know, Mr. Smith," retorts Liane in a voice laced with sarcasm. "Perhaps the sign in my window that states that very thing might have given you the slightest indication."

"Oh," deflates the Doctor. "Well, I didn't notice that." He tugs on his ear as he acknowledges sheepishly, "I don't really do that well with the obvious, I much more prefer the understated."

Jack prevents Liane's lunge towards the Doctor and apologizes, "You'll have to forgive him, Liane, he's _supposedly _a genius. You know how eccentric they are." He sweeps some more bits of pastry out of her hair and pulls off her glasses and cleans them with his handkerchief before placing them back onto her face.

He gently lays his hands on her shoulders and suggests, "Now just close your eyes, take a nice deep, calming breath, slowly release it and think of patisseries."

Jake and David have been watching everything from afar and quietly approach so as to not disturb Liane's meditation. "What happened?" whispers Jake.

"Don't ask," reply the Doctor and Jack in unison.

Liane's frazzled expression soon changes into one of serenity and she slowly opens her eyes. She sighs, "Thanks, Jack. You always know what to say."

She leans against his arm, giving him an affectionate squeeze and he tilts his head until their foreheads are touching. "Well you know that nobody has ever been able to handle you like me, Liane."

At this comment, David growls out, "What? Who are you?"

While the others are taken aback by the abrupt interruption, Jake steps in to smooth things over. He claps his hands together to draw their attention and poses, "Introductions, yes! That's exactly what we need so that we can all get to know each other better."

He waves his hand to indicate David. "Liane Piper, Jack Harkness, this is my best friend, David McDonald. We grew up in Scotland together." Jake turns to David and shoots him a meaningful look while emphatically stating, "Just like the two of you grew up together in Ireland when Jack lived there during his teen years."

Jack offers a warm smile and handshake and greets, "Nice to meet you, David." He grimaces as David grips his hand a little too hard before turning all of his attention towards Liane.

"Liane Piper," breathes David as he lifts both of her hands in greeting and uses his thumbs to rub soothing circles on the backs of her hands. "I would like to be your mate."

Liane smiles widely. "That's so sweet of you. Jack always says that you can never have enough friends."

"You two seem very close," comments David before throwing a glare in Jack's direction. "Exactly how close are you?"

Jack answers, "Pretty close. After I left Ireland, we stayed in touch and went on holidays together." He throws his arm around Liane's shoulder and declares proudly, "I was even her first."

David's eyes slowly begin to darken to their natural state as he gasps, "Your first?"

Liane giggles at the memory. "Yes, Jack was the first customer in my bakery. He traveled all the way from Cardiff for the grand opening. Once he bought something, he jumped over the counter and helped me with the baking the rest of the day."

She gazes adoringly at Jack. "Now that he lives in Cardiff, we can see each other all of the time."

David begins to take on the slightest green tint and it's not all from jealousy. "How nice. So, have you been seeing much of each other then?"

Jack pouts, "Not lately. Our schedules have been so crazy that I'm lucky if I'm even able to stop by the bakery."

Liane confesses, "I do miss not seeing you as often as I'd like but work does tend to get in the way of pleasure." She sighs fondly in remembrance, "Time was when Jack practically lived at the shop. Bless him, he'd come inside my little place all day if you'd let him."

David's eyes flash jet black and for one brief moment his true appearance is revealed. Jack and Liane are too lost in their memories to detect any change but Jake does notice and so does the Doctor.

Jake hurriedly scouts the room for anyone who may have seen the transformation and ends with his gaze landing on the Doctor, who is arching an eyebrow inquiringly in his direction. _Busted. Oh, well. No sense in worrying about it now._

Jack and Liane are still reminiscing over the grand opening so he elbows David in the side and motions for him to reestablish his shimmer. David rapidly adjusts his glamour while the Doctor kindly inquires of Liane's assistants to give David time to ensure his shimmer's stability.

"I missed seeing Sadie and Susie when I stopped by the shop yesterday, Liane. How are they?" Liane answers brightly, "Oh, they are absolutely wonderful! Their mum stopped by so I told them to leave early. They were going to stop for a quick stroll in the park before they tried out that new pub, The Fire Hydrant, and then they were going out dancing."

She chuckles as she remarks, "They are two of the sweetest white haired old ladies that I have ever met and they are so energetic too! I don't know how I could possibly run my shop without them."

Jack laughs, "And their mum, Allie, she's a firecracker! She spends her free time volunteering at a nursing home. You have to watch out for her though," he rubs his cheek ruefully; "she's a pincher."

Liane inquires, "Has the bruise faded yet?"

Jack replies, "Almost. It doesn't bother me so much, I can just about sit comfortably now."

Jake brags, "David's a great guy too, Liane, and he'd really like to get to know you."

Liane, who is incredibly well known for her shyness, quietly asks in astonishment, "Really?"

David moves closer to her while vehemently stating, "Yes, I would. Intimately."

Liane takes a step back and utters nervously, "That's a little too fast for me. Why don't we start out slow?"

David heartily agrees, "Sure thing, lass! Slow, fast, however you'd like it!"

Liane's eyes widen at the suggestive subtext and she peeps, "Excuse me?"

David wears a mask of confusion as he replies, "Our relationship, Liane. Whatever pace that you'd like to take it. We won't miss out on anything." His voice lowers into a sultry tone, "I'm very thorough."

Noticing a flash of concern cross Liane's features, Jake interjects, "In regards to people's interest. He likes to get to know a person to the point that he can practically read their mind."

Liane slowly relaxes and murmurs, "Oh, I see." Desperate to shift everyone's attention away from her, Liane politely inquires, "What can you tell me about yourself, David?"

Taking this as a sign of interest, David proudly boasts, "I'm a construction supervisor so I can fix all sorts. If there's anything that I can help you with, anything at all, just call me and I'll pop right over. I can assure you, I'm very capable of taking care of any of your needs."

She darts a sidelong glance at Jake, who hastily supplies, "He loves to help people."

Although hesitant to pursue her query, Liane bravely plunges ahead. "So, what interests you?"

"You, you interest me," replies David eagerly. "I want to know everything about you. Tell me about yourself. Where do you live? What kind of car do you drive?"

Feeling more than a little uncomfortable at this line of questioning, Liane leans back and requests, "Could you please back up a little? You're fogging up my glasses."

She throws a pleading look Jake's way and he tries to calm her down by reasoning, "Isn't it great to meet someone who doesn't make it all about him?" At her gaping stare, he whispers soothingly, "Relax, Liane, he's just scoping you out."

Liane whispers back worriedly, "What, like a purse snatcher?"

Jake rolls his eyes and chastises, "Everyone else sees how beautiful you are except for you. He's just nervous, give him a chance."

Eyeing David suspiciously out of the corner of her eye, she poses, "Are you sure that he didn't just lose a bet?" Jake bumps her shoulder with his own in admonishment and Liane announces, "Well, David, it's been lovely to meet you but I'm running late for the gym."

She turns to Jake and asks, "Would it be alright if I changed here so I can save some time?"

Jake replies, "Not a problem." He then teases, "I was wondering how long you'd be able to stay in your business gear before the t-shirts and trainers made an appearance."

Liane mock laughs, "Ha, ha, very funny," as she reaches down to adjust her ankle strap again. "Not all of us can be runway models. Is it my fault that I prefer comfort over fashion?" She blows the fringe out her eyes and grumbles, "I just need to get out of these clothes."

"I agree," enthuses David.

Jake shoots David a dark look as he points down the hall and directs, "The ladies room is down the hall, your last right."

As she leaves, David starts to follow her and she spins around with her hand in the air to ward him off. "I'll be right back."

David watches her walk down the hall and muses, "I've never seen a more seductive sway of the hips."

"Yeah," notes Jake dryly, "she never really has learned to walk in heels without toppling over."

David beams at Jake and opines, "For a first meeting, I think that went rather well."

"Yeah," states Jake in a sarcastic tone as he claps him on the back, "better than I hoped for." At David's answering nod, Jake pulls him aside and advises, "Mate, seriously, you have to tone it down a notch. You're freaking her out. I may be the god of love but there's only so many ways that I can come up with to cover your lame attempts at…at whatever that train wreck was. I haven't seen anything that pathetic since Jack started trying to impress Donna."

Jack and the Doctor have been silently watching their display in morbid fascination until Jake's slur which causes Jack to retort, "Hey!"

The Doctor decides to show his support of his best friend by stating, "Well said," before quickly turning away to hide his manic grin at Jake's remark.

Jake casts an aside glance to Jack and accuses, "If the shoe fits, Cinderella! Now zip it!"

Wanting to contribute his share of romantic expertise, the Doctor suggests, "A less aggressive approach is definitely called for when it comes to Liane, McDonald. From what Jack tells me, she's very skittish when it comes to male attention. A sweet girl like Liane prefers a gentle touch."

David returns the Doctor's advice with a hard stare and threatens menacingly, "Yes, she is very sweet and I've heard all about your sweet tooth, Mr. Smith. I'd keep an eye on that if I were you before you have to visit the dentist for losing all of your teeth!"

The Doctor's eyes widen at the not so thinly veiled threat and he mutters, "I know a man with big ears and a black leather jacket that you would have gotten along famously with."

Jake notices Liane returning and urges, "Remember, pull it back a bit and don't creep her out."

Liane rejoins the group sporting a large smile and work out clothes that includes a t-shirt declaring 'Earth Girls Are Easy'.

David is barely able to control his shimmer and is unable to take his eyes off of her chest. "I love your shirt!"

Jake shakes his head in resignation and thinks, _Yeah, like that._

Liane's smile instantly changes from one of friendliness to unease and without missing a beat, she announces her departure and makes a beeline straight for the elevator with David right on her heels. "So," he casually asks as he keeps pace with her and Jake trails behind him, "do you ever go to The Ale Ye Inn? It's my favorite pub."

Liane continues her fast paced stride until she reaches the elevator. "I'm not really social, I tend to stay in a lot."

David presses, "I would love to take you out sometime, and it doesn't have to be around a lot of people. We could go somewhere quiet and private, away from prying eyes. Perhaps, we could go to a forest or a quarry?"

Liane's response to his suggestion is to repeatedly press the elevator button as Jake states, "He's very into nature, but what Scot isn't?" He chuckles nervously. "Aye?"

The elevator doors finally slide open and David bleats in a panic stricken voice, "Jake! She's getting away!"

All eyes fall upon Jake waiting to hear his latest defense. Holding his hands up in the air in a gesture of surrender, he grudgingly admits, "Okay, sorry, but there's no way to fix that one."

Liane hurries inside the elevator car and is surprised to see Jake being the one preventing the doors from closing as David peers over his shoulder to look at her. Jake begs, "Liane, please trust me. I swear he's not usually like this. I'll have a talk with him and we'll discuss the boundaries and differences between courtships versus stalking. Honest, lass, you have nothing to worry about. Please give him a chance."

Jake pushes away from the doors to allow Liane time to mull over and digest this information in peace. As the elevator doors slowly close, the last thing she sees is David as he keeps craning his neck further and further in order to catch one last glimpse of her.

Jack lets out a snort and insists haughtily, "My 'please give me a chance' speech was so much better," before he takes his leave.

David is still staring at the elevator doors as he gushes, "She's perfect, Jake! She's just like me!"

Jake's eyes widen in shock and he whispers, "You mean that she's an alien too?"

David answers, "No, she puts on an appearance for others to hide her true self." He sighs. "And she's a goddess."

"You really think so?" inquires Jake, pleased that someone has finally taking notice of Liane, not just for her culinary skills but for herself.

David insists, "Absolutely! The way she kept adjusting her glasses," he gives a shiver, "it was so sexy!" He stares off in memory and recalls dreamily, "And the way her bun kept falling to the side and coming loose", he sighs again, "it was like she was losing her shimmer."

Jake watches him in amusement and asks jokingly, "You really got it bad, huh? Do you happen to hear a love song whenever you're near her?"

David stares at him in disbelief. "Yeah, I do. Did you hear it too?"

Jake gazes at him curiously. "You really do hear a song? Which one?"

David chirps, "The Spiderman theme song."

"What?" marvels Jake. "Why on Earth would you hear that?"

David gives him a disgruntled look and proclaims, "Because I _love _that song!"

Jake shakes his head in wonder and voices, "Wow. Sometimes I forget how alien you are."

David exhibits a massive grin as he throws his arm around Jake's shoulder and concurs, "And sometimes I forget how human you are. It's great isn't it?" He appears slightly guilty as he asks, "Jake, would you mind terribly if I took a rain check on lunch?"

Jake happens to spy the copy repairman stepping out of the elevator and grins wolfishly. "No worries, mate." With a nod of his head, he indicates the repairman. "I think I'm about to meet the father of my children."

David smirks in response and states, "Well, I'm off to go join a gym." An idea suddenly occurs to him. "You wouldn't happen to know of any other places that I could meet up with her, would you?"

Jake ponders this for a moment before remembering, "She does teach a cooking class. We could check that out this weekend."

David exclaims, "That sounds great!"

Jake teases, "Yeah, I'll let you know if I think of any more places that you can stalk her." David pulls a face before stepping into the elevator and waving goodbye.

Jake spins around to find the Doctor right behind him and casually inquiring, "Rapture can be such a nasty little bother, can't it?"

Jake is mildly surprised and questions, "How did you know that was the problem?"

The Doctor gives Jake a knowing gaze and pronounces, "We have an Owthtiwretteb in my universe too. Also, McDonald isn't usually that much of an idiot."

Jake requests, "Please don't say anything to anybody, Doctor. Liane's the first person that David's ever shown any interest in and I'd like to see if they're able to handle a relationship at all before that bit of news comes out."

The Doctor nods and promises, "Nobody will hear anything from me, Jake. In fact, I'll even help. It'll do McDonald a world of good to take a break from the hotel and from Rose."

Jake rolls his eyes at the Doctor's unfounded jealousy but still decides to provoke him anyway. "I agree. It's funny though, that instead of Rose that he ends up with her exact duplicate."

"What?" squeaks the Doctor. "What are you on about, Jake?"

Jake gawps at him in amazement. "You are kidding me, aren't you, Doctor? Are you telling me that you've never once noticed that with the exception of her hair and eye color, glasses, and her ever present aura that screams 'absolutely no confidence' that you've yet to realize that she and Rose could be twins?"

The Doctor tilts his head in consideration and throws on his brainy specs as if to see what he has overlooked. Realization finally dawns and a scowl erupts across his features. "That two bit lothario is trying to see Rose naked!"

"Doctor," drones Jake, "it's not Rose he's after, it's Liane. Her _parallel._ Her _duplicate._"

"Right, Jake!" snarls the Doctor as he thrusts the box with the stuffed owl into Jake's hands. "Like those types of relationships ever work out!" he growls before storming off to Donna's office.

Jake sighs inwardly to himself as he drops the box on top of his desk and heads over to the copy room. _Oh, well. I have my own duplicate man to check out._

**Next Chapter: Reckoning**


	3. Chapter 3

**Author's Note:** These last two chapters would have been up by Valentine's Day if what I had thought was a very bad flu hadn't turned out to be a very bad kidney infection. I dragged myself out of my sick bed to post these two chapters, I hope that you think the wait was worth it.

For those of you who haven't read Blast To The Past, there are a few references that you might not be familiar with. Just know that Donna had a very adverse reaction to Jack's special blend of coffee, the D & D Bistro is Jack's favorite theme restaurant and that this version of Jack and alcohol _never_ mix well.

**Disclaimer:** I do not own anything in relation to Dr. Who.

**Chapter 3 Reckoning**

Much sooner than he'd prefer, the Doctor finds himself rapidly approaching Donna's office. He has never cared much for dealing with visiting dignitaries, but visiting directors? Even less so.

He takes a moment in the hallway to compose himself for what awaits him. With a sigh of resignation, the Doctor walks swiftly towards Donna's office hoping that he'll be able to offer his assistance and take his leave to make amends with Rose. _Perhaps chips?_ he muses. _You can't go wrong with chips._

He passes through the doorway and stops dead in his tracks when he recognizes the woman who Donna is talking to. _Oh, no. Not her. Not today._ He continues to stare on in shock as he quickly realizes that the visiting Director of Human and Alien Relations is also this universe's parallel for Madame de Pompadour.

He hurriedly retreats into the safety of the corridor while simultaneously inventing twenty-six different excuses for his upcoming absence from the meeting. Twenty-seven if you count his impending death by Rose's hand if she finds out that _she's_ here.

He's about to sprint down the hall when Donna's voice calls out, "Oi! It's about time, Doctor!" She stands up from behind her desk and introduces, "This is Jeanne Poisson from Torchwood France. Her department received some alien artifacts at the last Intergalactic Peace Summit and her team has had some difficulty with accurately identifying them. She needs your expertise on what's safe to keep and what she should send back along with any advice on how not to offend the various ambassadors and their governments."

The Doctor remains standing outside the doorway, hesitant to move one way or the other. Jeanne watches him curiously and asks, "Is there something wrong Dr. Smith?" He shakes his head without taking his eyes off of her. She smirks knowingly and inquires smugly, "I'm not making you nervous, am I Dr. Smith?"

Donna rolls her eyes in exasperation when Jeanne saunters over to the Doctor, swaying her hips a bit more than necessary. "I won't bite," she persuades and then exhibits a feral smile to the contrary. She stretches out her arm and holds her hand out to him. "Join me? A door once opened may be stepped through in either direction."

The Doctor gulps audibly as he reluctantly takes her hand and allows her to pull him into the room. Donna walks past them muttering, "Finally!" She turns before she reaches the door and informs them, "I have some things to take care of, Jack knows where to reach me in case you need me."

Before the Doctor can squawk in protest at Donna's abandonment, she has left the room and left him with Jeanne. "I've been looking forward to working with you, Dr. Smith. I hope that the pleasure of our coming together won't only be mine," she breathes throatily.

Donna's relief at leaving the awkward situation behind her is short lived as she enters the hallway to find a stunned Rose frozen in place. Concern instantly fills her heart and she rushes over to her and grips her arms. "Rose, what's wrong?" She gives her a slight shake and demands, "Rose, answer me! Are you okay?"

Rose turns her head the slightest bit in Donna's direction but her eyes remain glued to the doorway. "It's her Donna, it's Reinette." She faces Donna as she grimly states, "Or at least this world's version of her."

"Reinette?" repeats Donna in astonishment. "You mean that French trollop from the spaceship?"

"Yeah," croaks Rose. "Her."

Before Donna can utter another word, Jeanne's laughter floats through the doorway and she purrs, "You are such an angel to help me, Dr. Smith." Both women peer into the room to see Jeanne remove his glasses and pull him closer to her by his necktie, their lips almost touching. "Tell me, Doctor, are you a lonely angel?"

Rose recoils from the sight of them together as if she'd been slapped. She can barely breathe as she places her hand over her chest to calm her pounding heart. It was exactly like before. She was so positive that he loved their life together; that he loved her and that nothing in the universe could ever come between them. Now, she wasn't so sure. She squeezes her eyes shut tight against the memory and whispers, "I guess some things never change, not even in a parallel universe."

Rose murmurs, "Excuse me, Donna," before bolting down the corridor. Donna wants desperately to call out to her friend but she knows that there's nothing that she can say. She knows that the only words that can offer any comfort at this moment have to come from the man inside that room. She hopes with all of her heart that he is able to give them to her.

Donna leans through the doorway and watches as the Doctor practically falls backwards onto her desk when he reclaims his glasses and attempts to remove his tie from her grasp. "I'm sorry to interrupt but I need to speak with the Doctor. It's urgent."

With a look of euphoria at the chance to escape Jeanne's clutches, the Doctor scrambles off of the desk and runs towards Donna. As he's exiting the room, he hears Jeanne urging, "Hurry though, my love. My time grows short and my visit is nearing its end."

The Doctor breathes a sigh of relief as he reaches the safety of the corridor. That is until Donna grabs him by the necktie and slams him against the wall. "Donna! What the…," yelps the Doctor.

"Shut it, Spaceman!" growls Donna. "You don't have much time and you need to find Rose as soon as possible!"

"Rose?" The Doctor promptly bolts upright in alarm. "What's wrong with Rose?"

Donna answers coldly, "She's heartbroken, because of you." When he looks at her in befuddlement, she clarifies, "She was here in the hallway earlier when you met Jeanne and after I left the room. She saw and heard _everything._"

The Doctor immediately pales at the countless possibilities of what Rose must be thinking right now. Donna takes in his reaction and states, "Good, I can see that you're catching up with me. Now as much as I'd love nothing more than to rip your head off and use it as my new paperweight, I'm more concerned with how you're going to fix this."

When he continues to remain speechless, she places her hands on her hips and barks, "Look, Sunshine, I'm not going to let Rose end up being 'The Girl Who Waited'! She waited five and a half hours for you to come back, she waited years while working on the Dimension Canon to return to you and she's waited years for you to finally wake up and realize what you want!"

She moves in closer and softly hisses, "Now the difference between the girl that she was then and the woman that she is now is this. She has a job that she loves, a workplace where her colleagues respect her, family and friends who adore her, a university education and pretty much her pick of young, handsome, _loyal_, men who are available."

The Doctor starts sputtering in indignation but Donna silences him by clamping her hand over his mouth. "The point that I'm trying to make, Dimbo, is that the girl may have waited for you but the woman doesn't need to. In fact, after everything that she's been through, I wouldn't be at all surprised if she's decided that she might be better off in giving her _forever_ to someone else."

The Doctor instantly sobers at not just Donna's threatening tone but at the actual possibility that Rose would leave him. She can tell the instant that he realizes this and declares, "Time's up, Doctor. You chose her once on that beach. Are you ready to prove that you'll stand by that decision and her?"

No more words are said and the Doctor takes off down the hall in search of his Rose. Donna watches him leave and then turns back towards her office. "And now for you," she grumbles.

She finds Jeanne primping herself in a mirror eagerly awaiting the Doctor's return. "Jeanne? I'm sorry but the Doctor had something very important to attend to. Perhaps you'd like to reschedule for another time or I can see if our other alien tech expert, Henry Vanzant has returned from his assignment."

Jeanne displays a pretty pout before refusing Donna's offer. "No, I've met Mr. Vanzant. He is very boring." She suddenly perks up and inquires, "What about Mr. Harkness? He's very handsome and clever and he seems to have all sorts of hidden possibilities."

Donna's smile falters slightly but her eyes turn cold. "I don't see that being a problem. In fact, while I go find him," she walks over to Jack's desk and pulls a canister out of his drawer, "why don't you make some coffee? This is Jack's special blend and I know that he'd be thrilled to discover how much you enjoy it."

Jeanne accepts the canister and says, "Thank you so much, Donna. You have been most helpful."

Donna smiles sweetly and replies, "I try my best," as she heads over to the door. "Feel free to use my office as long as you like, it even has a private bathroom." She thinks to herself with evil glee, _You're going to need it._

She leaves the room with a smirk which quickly falls away when she sees Jack wearing an identical one as he leans against the wall with his arms crosses casually over his chest. "Should I call the infirmary and let them know that they'll have incoming?"

Donna looks slightly caught out but firmly insists, "I don't know what you're referring to, Jack."

Jack gazes at her shrewdly and patronizes, "No, of course not." His tone then turns anxious as he pleads, "You're not really going to make me go in there, are you?"

She sidles up alongside him and queries, "Is that a problem?"

Jack's arms cross in a more defensive gesture as he grimaces in memory. "Yeah, it is. This morning wasn't the first time that we've met, we crossed paths at my last Torchwood. She has a way of making the male employees that don't accept her advances…uncomfortable."

"So the rumors are true then?" presses Donna.

Jack lets out a derisive snort before answering, "I assume you mean that she treats men like musical chairs because she's always looking for the next one to straddle? Absolutely true, no over exaggeration there."

Donna tilts her head towards the ground while slyly gazing up at Jack. "So does that mean that it doesn't bother you that I gave her your special blend?"

He leans in closer and whispers, "Why else do you think that I brought in a fresh batch today?"

Donna rears back in shock and stares at Jack, greatly impressed. "Why, Jack, that's so naughty of you!" When he blushes, she purrs, "Let's try and cultivate that, shall we?"

She links her arm through his as she tugs him down the corridor. "I was thinking that we could go out later and celebrate this Valentine's Day that Rose told me about."

"Really?" chirps Jack, practically glowing. His expression becomes slightly downcast. "Please tell me that you don't want to go out for drinks?"

Donna laughs and states, "No, but I was wondering if we could go to the D & D Bistro for dinner."

Jack interrupts both of their strides when he halts in surprise. "What? Are you serious?" At her affirming nod, he whoops, "That's awesome! They have a new menu item that I've been dying to try, it's called Chicken Curse-a-tori!"

Donna grins in response and inquires, "Can we take Castor at his word or do we need to call ahead?"

Jack poses, "Donna Noble," and unexpectedly gives her a twirl that lands her in his arms, "let's definitely make this a night without reservation."

Donna looks at him in wonder and murmurs, "I'd like that very much, Jack Harkness." She tugs him closer by the lapels of his blazer and whispers huskily, "And what happens after dinner?"

Jack's answering grin is more goofy than seductive when he replies in a voice full of promise, "All the excitement that you could ask for!" He lowers his voice into an enticing tone and proclaims, "The D & D game tables are open late tonight. I'll give you a few tips to amass enough points that you can be my apprentice. That way you can assist me with handling my wand."

Donna muses, "And yet I have a feeling that I'll still end up wandless tonight."

Jack soothes, "That's only because you don't know how the game is played."

Donna retorts, "That makes two of us." At Jack's confused countenance, she sighs and urges, "Come on, Jack. If you help me out then maybe we can leave early."

Jack nods agreeably and they head out to the outer offices, only stopping at a brief squeaking noise from the copy room followed by a repetitive thumping. They stare at each other with widened eyes until Jack notes, "I've never heard the copier make that sound before. I hope that they can fix it."

Donna merely offers a blank stare in return and relates, "Trust me, Jack. That copier is getting all of the attention that it needs. Let's go," she mutters before dragging him down the hall as fast as she can.

**Final Chapter Resolution**


	4. Chapter 4

**Author's Note:** It is my opinion, that after the Doctor becoming half human and Rose having matured from a young girl to a woman and then from everything that she must have witnessed traveling through the void, that they would now each have a better understanding from where the other was coming from whenever an argument would arise. I am really straying from my usual humor here but it will pop up again towards the end and you are guaranteed a happy ending. I hope you enjoy my resolution to the conflict that the Doctor and Rose have experienced over Reinette. This was the only way that I could accept his leaving Rose behind on the spaceship, I hope that this works for you too.

**Disclaimer:** I do not own anything in relation to Dr. Who.

**Chapter 4 Resolution**

The Doctor is frantically running up and down searching the halls, not stopping for one moment, until he finally finds her. "Rose!" he calls out as she ignores him and continues to walk down the hall. "Rose?" he calls out again more gently.

She sniffles softly and answers, "I'd rather be alone right now, Doctor."

Although every instinct is screaming at him to run away, he has sworn to himself that he will never abandon her again in any way, shape or form. "I know that you must be upset but it's not what you think, Rose." He quickens his pace to try to keep up with her. "I swear."

She continues walking away from him and doesn't even turn around as she replies in a flat voice, "I'm not upset, Doctor. I'm fine. I'm always fine."

Alarm settling in his heart at the emptiness of her words, he quickly sprints down the rest of the hall and grabs her by the shoulders. He looks around and spies a broom closet. "Quickly, in here before somebody sees us."

She attempts to pull free but his grip is unrelenting. "What do you think you're doing, Doctor?" she hisses.

"We need privacy, Rose, and it's doubtful that anyone's going to look for us in here," he replies as he locks the door for added protection. He turns around to find her leaning against a shelf unit with her arms crossed protectively across her chest. Her eyes are slightly reddened and moist while the rest of her face remains stoic.

"What's this all about, Doctor?" she asks quietly.

"I know what you saw or what you think that you saw, but **nothing **happened between me and Miss Poisson."

She shakes her head in disbelief and accuses, "You mean like before?"

The Doctor states firmly, "I mean exactly like before," before quickly backpedaling, "except for the snog. I didn't snog Miss Poisson. I did snog Reinette but I didn't enjoy it!"

Rose snorts in disgust, "That why you went and bragged about it then?"

The Doctor looks a bit caught out as he admits, "Okay, I did enjoy it but not for the reasons that you think I did! It wasn't a kiss of love or passion, Rose. It was fascination."

"Fascination?" questions Rose, still very disbelieving but instantly experiencing her own fascination at the anticipation of the answer she's about to receive.

"Yes," answers the Doctor, grateful that she appears to be listening with keen interest. "She just…she just fascinated me completely, every aspect of her life. She was a woman who was born in a time where women basically had no options much less limited ones. It may not be acceptable by 21st century standards, but she did the best she could with what she had been given and she excelled in the most marvelous ways!"

"Yes, I know," remarks Rose sadly. "She was an actress, artist, musician, dancer, courtesan and a fantastic gardener!" She laughs bitterly. "You know, it wasn't that long ago that I would've made some nasty crack like 'Gardening? How perfect for a ho-"

"Rose Tyler!" warns the Doctor playfully. "You are so much better than that now." He smiles kindly at her. "Besides, that wasn't the point that I was trying to make," he rubs the back of his neck, "or at least not all of it."

She glances up at him wearily. "The point that I was trying to make is that I was fascinated by her brilliance and her determination and her potential. Potential that was forced to be wasted due to the constraints of her time. I was astounded by what she had accomplished on Earth, Rose. I can only imagine what she would've done once she explored the stars. _That's_ why I was so fascinated with her."

Rose's gaze is far off as if she's recalling a distant memory. "Yeah, I remember. The look that you would have on your face when you talked about her, it was indescribable. Even in _the way_ that you would talk about her, like she was the most amazing thing that you had ever seen in all of your lives." She suddenly looks at him, both her gaze and tone hard. "And then you lost her and you wouldn't say anything and you acted like you had nothing." She reveals all of her heartbreak at that memory in one telling glance before looking off again. "You made me feel… like I was nothing."

The Doctor's eyes widen in horror and he is rendered speechless at the amount of pain that he can see Rose still holds in her heart. "We didn't have to be lovers, Doctor, but we were still best mates. I could understand you choosing the uncrowned Queen of France over a shop girl with no A- levels but you wouldn't even talk to me. You wouldn't let me in and as much as you hurt me by doing that, I still hurt for you and I just wanted to help." Her tone betrays the slightest trace of anger, "Instead, you just dismissed me as if I was nothing but the help."

In the barest whisper she finishes, "You made me feel like **nothing.**"

"No. No, no, no, no, no, Rose Tyler. You are not now nor will you ever be **nothing.** **Not to me.**" He tugs at his hair in distraction in an effort to force himself to focus and think how he can relate everything he needs to say to put this situation right, to end this last doubt in their relationship once and for all.

He takes a deep breath and vows, "You are **everything** to me, Rose Tyler. It's true, Reinette fascinated me but she never captivated me, not like you do. She filled up brief moments of time in my life but you are my life."

Old habits die hard and he averts his gaze as he opens up completely to her. "She held my attention, but you…you hold my heart. And back then…you held both of them. And that scared me, absolutely terrified me. Always the coward, me. I wasn't just jumping through a time window, I was running away. I was running away from you and everything that you made me feel."

His laugh comes out bitter and his tone resentful as he throws his arms up in the air and confesses, "The great renegade allowed centuries of Gallifreyan mores and teachings to influence his behavior long after his exile! It was just too deeply ingrained in me to break the pattern of keeping my distance emotionally," he takes her hand, "if not physically. It's what kept me silent from telling you how much I love you and how much I will always love you. It's what kept me running from you when all I've ever wanted to do is run to you and with you."

The intensity of his gaze rivals that of The Oncoming Storm for power but it is the passion and plea in that one look that draws Rose to him. "I don't want to be that man anymore, Rose Tyler. I want to be the man that you need me to be."

As she moves closer to him, she cups his cheek and gently traces his jaw line with her fingers. "You already are," she tells him softly. "I know how hard it still is for you to open yourself up to me but you still manage to do it. You share everything with me, Doctor. Your body, your thoughts," she places her other hand over his chest, "and your one beautiful heart." She stares down at his chest while she fingers his lapels. "And until today, I didn't have any real doubts that you wouldn't stay."

He places his fingers under chin and tips it up forcing her to meet his gaze. "Oh, you don't ever need to have any doubts about that at all, Rose Tyler. I'm not going to leave you. The truth be told, I'm never letting you go, Rose." He slides his hands down to her waist and tightens his grip swearing vehemently, "Not ever. Even if you try to leave, I'll be right behind you and if this conversation has proven anything, it's proven that there's nobody more expert at running than me."

He leans in and rests his forehead against hers. "There is nothing and no one that will ever separate us again, Rose. Take it from The Oncoming Storm," his voice darkening while his eyes carry a steely glint, "I wouldn't want to be the thing or person that is foolish enough to try."

Her response is immediate and reminiscent of Bad Wolf Bay. She yanks him to her by his lapels and brings their lips crashing together in a kiss filled with longing, passion and most important of all, love. Rose is the first to pull away and leaving a string of kisses along his jaw line, whispers, "Doctor, let's go home."

The Doctor hums, "Mmmmm," distractedly in response. When Rose continues to stare smugly at him, he snaps out of his dreamlike state and blurts, "Yes, of course! After all, there's no place like home!" He spins around and turns the door knob. "I'll just…I'll just…I'll just not open the door, shall I?"

Rose comes up behind him and peers over his shoulder. "The lock's probably broken. We can get out with the sonic, right?"

"Yes, right, absolutely, we are able to escape this minor unplanned predicament with my ever reliable sonic screwdriver." He turns to her with a nervous smile and states, "Or we could if it wasn't currently sitting in the pocket of my trench coat along with my cell phone." She's about to suggest using her own cell phone when he continues, "And your mobile which I had promised to fix last night but had completely forgotten about once I realized what day that today was."

Rose's look of astonishment quickly turns into one of disbelief as she is aware of how easily he always dismisses holidays with the ever so trite 'you humans and your silly traditions'.

"Okay," he confesses. "I forgot all about it once your mother rang up and told me in no uncertain terms that _one_, we should celebrate Valentines Day whether this stupid bloody universe has it or not, _two_, I should lavish you with gifts that aren't crap and _three_, to make absolutely sure that I didn't do some weird, alien thing to balls it all up." He looks around at their current conundrum and mutters, "Mission accomplished."

Rose's laugh turns into a groan as she scans the broom closet for another exit. "Doctor, what are going to do now?"

The Doctor pulls on his ear as he stares up at the ceiling. "Well, I'm sure that eventually someone will come along and free us from our little prison. In the meantime," he takes her by the shoulder and asks very seriously, "have we said everything that needs saying?"

Rose's smile fades a little as she replies equally serious, "No, we haven't, Doctor. There's still one more thing that I need to know." He nods and takes her hands in both of his and gives them a gentle squeeze of encouragement. Her eyes are suddenly alight with mischief as she inquires teasingly, "Does the banana tree nursery that we put in the hotel have anything to do with Jabe from Platform One?"

The Doctor's head jerks back in surprise and he laughs out loud before promising with his hand over his heart and a twinkle in his eyes, "Not a thing, Rose Tyler. Not a blessed thing."

They cling to each other in their laughter, all right with the world, until they hear a voice outside the door apologizing, "Sorry, Jacks. It looks like someone's already making use of this closet."

Rose immediately lets go of the Doctor and starts pounding on the door. "Dad, is that you?"

Pete's voice is laced with shock and confusion as he yells through the door, "Rose, sweetheart, what on Earth are you doing in there?"

"Never mind that, Dad! We're stuck in here! Can you please just let us out?" begs Rose.

"Sure, sweetheart," assures Pete's muffled voice. "Just give me a minute." They can just make out the jingle of keys when the door opens to reveal Pete and Jackie.

"So he's in there too?" teases Jackie.

"Who else would be in there with her?" he asks grumpily.

"Oh, I don't know," taunts Jackie. "I saw that _gorgeous_ David McDonald bloke earlier and he and Rose make would make such a cute couple…"

"What are you two doing here anyway?" demands the Doctor in an attempt to change the subject.

"Well, what do you think? It's Valentine's Day, isn't it?" huffs Jackie as she crosses her arms in annoyance. "Or it should be." She gives her daughter a pitying look and inquires, "He didn't bollocks up your special day, did he love?"

The Doctor is unable to reform a retort before Rose answers, "Not much, Mum." Her smile slowly turns into a smirk as she questions, "So I know what you're doing here at Torchwood, but what are the two of you doing _here_, exactly?"

Neither of her parents seems fazed or embarrassed by Rose's teasing and Jackie smoothly replies, "Your dad has to work late again so I thought I'd stop by and pay him a visit," her grin widens lecherously, "so that we could take care of our own unfinished business."

The Doctor makes a gagging noise and states, "I don't know which disgusts me more. The thought of what you two are planning to do in here or the fact that the Donna side of me is so supportive of it."

Jackie releases a snort of amusement. "Well, now that that's settled, in or out?"

The Doctor grabs Rose's hand and tugs her through the doorway. "Out, definitely out."

Dragging Rose down the hall at top speed, she barely has enough time to call out, "Thanks for the rescue and have fun!" while throwing them a saucy wink over her shoulder.

Only allowing them long enough to collect their things, the Doctor reaches for Rose's hand once again and continues his rapid pace until they reach the elevator. He pushes the elevator button and sighs in defeat. "That's it, Rose. Valentine's Day is officially over. Nothing can redeem it."

"Nothing?" queries Rose as she presses against him and whispers in his ear.

The Doctor's eyebrows shoot up almost as high as his spiked hair when he hears her suggestion. "The Red Riding Hood costume, really? And the marmalade body paint?" She nods her head looking so much more innocent than her proposal.

Eager to close the deal, the Doctor asks hopefully, "And just to clarify, I get to be the Bad Wolf this time?" Her enthusiastic nod spurs him into immediate action. "Well, Happy Valentine's Day to me! What are we waiting for?" He whips out the sonic screwdriver and aims it at the elevator to speed the car on its way to them and shouts out, "Allonsy!" upon its arrival.

They step into the elevator and turn just in time to see Jake walking by whistling a jaunty tune and sporting an enormous grin. Rose keeps watching him as he walks off while inquiring, "Doctor, why is Jake covered in toner?"

The Doctor chuckles softly and replies, "I think that he has a date tonight." He suddenly exhibits a startled look as he recalls something from earlier and advises, "Rose, you might want to stay away from the hotel's fountain area and Mrs. Murphy for the next few days, at least until I can clean everything up."

"And why do you need to do that?" asks Rose with great trepidition.

"Well," explains the Doctor, "it all started with some Koi that I saw in an exotic pet shop. You know how I love a little shop…"

**THE END**


End file.
